Day Three

Day Three

After three days of successfully resisting food all together and drinking a cocktail of minerals, vitamins and herbal laxatives there are a few rules that you may want to know about if attempting this

Rule #1 I was able to hike that past few days, so this is a good thing, so exercise is a doable option. Remember to prepare well in case of an emergency with supplies if nature calls.  Because when it calls on this journey, it does not hang up and call back later.

Rule #2 If for any reason you have it in your mind that you want to seize an opportunity of passing gas along the way, DON’T. If you do not want to change you shorts resist the urge! Do not get confidence thinking you are sure it is just wind that will be blowing, I promise you it is not!

Rule #3 Do not watch TV.   I never realized how much the advertising world wants you to eat their food.  Even though I am not hungry, I find my mouth salivating for restaurants I would never be found in; and pizza hut never looked so good; and what is up with the history channel picking this week to show all the shows on the history of food?

Rule #4 Now rule four is a big one and I am going to talk about this rule on other days of my journal. Do not let the carnal mind be the boss of you.  WOW I never realized how carnal food is to me. Talk about mind games.

DAY TWO

Day Two

I am allowed to have as many as 12 of those wonderful lemon concoctions a day. It is surprising that even if I start to feel hungry I throw one of those down my gullet and surprise I am good to go for another few hours. I was happy to find a fellow cleanser that is also doing this 10 day journey. 

So let me introduce the official  super team members of the marathon.  We have the ObiOneKanobi Sydney of cleansing. She is who we call when we have questions because she is a member of the frequent cleansing plan. Then we have Brad, my husband, who has so much more discipline than I do; all though I do get a chuckle when he comes running in the house making a mad dash for the toilet. 

Then we have Jenny, who is part of the motivational team, who at one time had a weak moment, and has now committed to finish the race. We will have a new member of the team on Monday, who will be introduced at that time.

Have you ever seen the movie elf, and how he loves maple syrup and puts it on his spaghetti? This is the only way I can describe how I feel about licking the spoon off the maple syrup. 

You cannot even imagine how excited I get when I get to lick the leftover maple off of Brad’s spoon, I almost get giddy. Later in the afternoon I noticed that a glob of the maple was running down the side of my glass, I realized I was licking the side of a glass like a cow licking the salt lick. The next thrill I get is the sound of the spoon clanking the bottom of my glass in case any syrup did not stir all the way, I would not want to miss the opportunity of more sweet treat. DAY TWO completed with success for the team.

DAY ONE

Well apparently this particular cleanse starts with a 32oz drink of water with 2 teaspoons of salt (That was the original size of the first  7-11 big gulp!) At first though you do not think that this would be too bad, 2 teaspoons is hardly anything.  Well I am here to tell you imagine yourself on the edge of a pacific coastal beach, put your toes in the water, it looks alright, now bend over and start sucking up the water in gulps, 120 to be exact (as I was told by a fellow cleanser). YUM YUM. Okay this will be the worst of it and thank goodness I am only doing that 3 of the 10 days of my journey. Now the fun begins! You know in monopoly when you get the go straight to jail, pass go and do not collect $200.00, oh and skip a turn too.  This is my definition of the Salt water Big Gulp, 7-11 style.  You do not leave your home, you better stay put for the next 45-60 min(THIS WOULD BE THE JAIL TIME AND MISSING A TURN), because this drink totally avoids the bladder all together and gives you the thrill by going straight to the colon. Now the good stuff,I get to drink fresh squeezed lemon juice from lemon a lemon tree I picked from up the street and add  real maple syrup and Cayenne.  That is the basic elements of the Cleanse. So now that you have that, I am glad to announce I survived day One. I only had a craving for potato chips; I knew that this was inevitable because that is usually the one craving I usually great.  The best part was within minutes of my craving weakness Ryan walks in with a bag of chips from his lunch. Well so much for removing any weak moment foods from your pantry.

The 10 Day Journey of the Cleanse

Cleansing Journal

I thought that through my journey of attempting to accomplish a 10 day cleanse, I would share this experience with all. I compare this adventure to someone completing a 25 mile marathon. I know you ask how does this even compare?  Believe me if you knew how much I love GOOD food, this cleanse is a personal marathon for me. First of all you need to know a little about me, food, and limitations.  Let’s start with the limitations: I am a person that is not a big snacker or eater and can skip a meal or two and be just fine; but for some reason if I am told you can only have…, or you cannot have…, my heart starts to skip a beat, I may even experience some perspiration from my upper lip. To be told I have limitations, is so restricting to me, I may even consume double quantities before the time that my limitation starts, because heaven forbid I may not make it through a “Sunday fast”, or the “don’t eat anything past midnight” before a procedure. I learned early on, that dieting was not my cup of tea; I seemed to be active enough in exercise that if I was monitored of what I consumed, I could avoid the whole diet thing.  Of course I have had my up and downs on the scale (WHO HASN’T) and made attempt of a diet or two; but learning one thing about myself I am not a dieter, it is not for me. I eat good and healthy and avoid all fast food. Now what you need to know about me is I am reaching the golden age of where I am seeing unusual mounds and rolls that do not belong and that almost need name recognition like, muffin top, rolly polly, hippy hipster, and junkin in the trunkin. So yes this could be one of the motivational reason as to attempting this ten day cleanse. It could also be because when 

I was hiking the other day I looked down at my ankle where my socks were coming out of my shoes, and I could swear I think I saw fat rolling over the top of my sock. I screamed in shock, to my very cautious husband, “What is that fat doing there, while I am hiking it up and down this hill diligently, IT HAS NO BUSINESS!” My husband trying to have the safest answer possible,  and knowing he has to finish the hike with me in this state of mind that I am now in, he says,……”your socks are just too tight that all.”  You have to appreciate the beauty and the eloquence of it all. My other reasons for doing this is, I need to have a stronger will power and this will be my mind over matter achievement of my life. I have ridden my bike a 100 miles before and I am telling you here and now this is a larger event than that. I also want to rid by vessel of any harmful toxins that it may have, and of course losing weight is AWESOME!!!  So enjoy the next 10 days with me and this mind over limitation journey.

WANTED TOADOMETER

I want to blog about the Toadometer.  You ask what is a Toadometer? It is none other than Ryan aka Toad.  It is curious to me as his siblings and their relationships continues to develop, he becomes the barometer for their life’s forecasts.  Let me explain so you can get the idea. As a mother I occasionally run into another mother that may want to set up their relative with one of our girls.  It does not matter what kind of detailed description I may give of the fine candidate, who may be the Nobel prize winner and on the cover of Men’s Health Magazine the perfect 10.  My girls always say, “ Have Toad check him out and see what he thinks, and then if he says he is fine, (now is this fine as in, “oh sooo fine” or is this fine as in acceptable) they will entertain the idea of the date”.  What is up with that, apparently my opinion is out to pasture and my judgment of, “oh sooo fine” out the window. Whatever…. I would make a great matchmaker; bring me back to those days. Ok back to the Toadometer. When Eric sends home a request of something he may need in the ways of clothing, because apparently I can’t be trusted in picking out apparel. I am asked Dear Mom,………need clothes……have Toad pick it out because he knows what I like.  I do not know how Brad and I became so blessed to bring this amazing aide to all future forecasts of life into this world.  He is an anomaly. We are thinking of putting these amazing abilities of our Toadometer on Craig’s list and put the Toadometer out to hire. So look for the Toadometer on your local Craig's List.

WANTED TOADOMETER: 

HE KNOWS WHAT YOU LIKE!!!!